<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> What should a woman do if her husband is adamant about getting a divorce but she wants to maintain the marriage for the sake of her young children? Should she cry and plead with her husband to change his mind? Or, should she just let go of him and get divorced?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy family became bankrupt as a result of my husband\u2019s attempt to expand his business beyond our means. His negligence toward me and my children made me fall into depression, and I\u2019ve had a very difficult time. Since last year, I started listening to your dharma talks and tried very hard to recover from my depression, but my husband has left the house demanding a divorce. I did the best I could every day while waiting for my husband to return home. Maybe thanks to those efforts, my children and I are doing better. However, my husband is still demanding a divorce and wants to talk about what to do about our children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shed tears while lamenting that all her effort to heal the wound of her family was in vain. Her suffering stems from one reason - wanting her husband to change. She should be comfortable with her husband just the way he is, but if the premise of her prayer is \u201cMy husband will change if I act in a certain way\u201d, her life will be dependent on her husband\u2019s behavior and attitude. She will be at peace if she understands her husband and sympathizes with him, but she will suffer if she thinks that her husband will change if she acts in a certain way. Because she was so dependent on her husband, she was crying about the fact that he hasn\u2019t changed his mind about wanting to divorce her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In a divorce lawsuit, she will be at a disadvantage is she initiates it, but if her husband is the one who initiates it, she doesn\u2019t have to worry about anything. The husband will have to do all the paperwork, hire a lawyer, schedule the date, and so on, so she won\u2019t have to do anything. When she goes to court, she can truthfully say, \u201cI still love my husband. Your honor, please protect our family.\u201d Then, the judge will very likely decide in her favor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If the husband still insists on getting a divorce, she can make her decision based on the situation. For example, he may offer her all his assets in return for a divorce. If he is adamant about getting a divorce, he may offer other incentives. If the offer is something she would be happy with, she can agree to the divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can a person act like that? How could I have ever married such a man?\u201d If she thinks this way, she will be so miserable that she won\u2019t be able to sleep. She should just let her husband be and lead a good life with her children. If the children ask why their father doesn\u2019t come home, she should simply console them by saying, \u201cYour father must be having some difficulties. Let\u2019s pray for him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the present modern age, women\u2019s rights are so well protected that women don\u2019t have to cling desperately to their marriage. Also, there is really no need for women to curse their husbands for wanting a divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Right now, she is still dependent on her husband, so her happiness and unhappiness are determined by her husband\u2019s actions. However, it will be good for her if she can sympathize with him, \u201cHe must be really troubled and frustrated to be acting that way\u201d and pray for him, \u201cI believe my husband will be fine. I love my husband.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This lady shouldn\u2019t expect her husband to change in any way or want him to come back and reunite with her. She should simply stop begging for happiness. She should become centered so she can stand on her own and have a positive mindset. Then, her face will brighten up and she will be able to raise her children well.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Don\u2019t Beg For Happiness","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"dont-beg-for-happiness","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:20:31","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:20:31","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17851","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":17844,"post_author":"40","post_date":"2024-01-09 08:58:00","post_date_gmt":"2024-01-09 13:58:00","post_content":"\n

-An extract from Venerable Pomnyun's book, Life Lessons<\/em>-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

---

\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/gwmw><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

<\/h1>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> In a marriage, there may come a time when one of the spouses is hospitalized and the other has to be the caretaker. If the husband and wife are on good terms, the healthy spouse will care for the sick spouse with devotion. However, if they have a rocky marriage, the caregiver may experience a great deal of frustration and hardship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> \u201cMy husband has been receiving treatment for a stroke and cancer for a few years now. He has not been a good husband or father, so I have been contemplating getting a divorce for the sake of my children who also want me to get divorced. I have to raise the children, and I don\u2019t have the time or money to take care of my husband. My future with my husband seems bleak, so I want to be separated from him.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> I can imagine how hard it must be for you since you have to bear the medical costs of your husband\u2019s treatment, and you have to raise the children all by yourself. Additionally, since you are not on good terms with your husband, it must be all the more difficult and stressful to take care of him. I could sympathize with you, but the consolation is not going to solve your problem. Instead, I will be blunt with you. I am afraid that with your mindset, it may be unlikely that your children will turn out well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You say that your children want you to get divorced, but that\u2019s because they are still young. They are not going to feel the same way when they get older. When the kids are young they usually take their mother\u2019s side when the parents argue. However, later, when they get older, they will realize that not only their father but also their mother has many faults. Right now, because their father is an invalid and bad-tempered, the children may ask, \u201cWhy do we have to live like this?\u201d Later, however, they will experience conflicting emotions of resenting you for abandoning their father and feeling grateful to you for having raised them. As a result, the kids may become emotionally unstable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even if you had a rocky marriage, you lived with your husband under one roof, and he is the father of your children. So it\u2019s best to make up your mind to take care of your husband. When he gets irritated, try to understand and comfort him. Tell yourself, \u201cHe must be in a lot of pain to be so angry.\" or, \"I came home late because of work, so it\u2019s natural that he should be irritated since he has been waiting for me for so long all by himself.\u201d By doing so you will receive many blessings. For instance, children raised by a mother who has such a big heart will very likely grow up to be happy upstanding adults even if the parents are too poor to send them to high school or college. On the contrary, if the mother abandons their father, even if the kids go to college and go on to study overseas, they are unlikely to lead happy lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If by chance your husband gets angry and irritated in front of your children it\u2019s best to explain to them, \u201cIf you were ill, you would be like that too. Your father is not a bad person, but he gets in a bad mood because he is in pain.\u201d When you speak to your children this way, they will be able to better understand their father and at the same time be inspired by their mother\u2019s big heart. Taking after their mother, the children will be able to cultivate compassion and develop good character. This is the real education that will help your children become successful in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While taking care of your husband, you may lament, \u201cWhat did I do in my past life to deserve this predicament?\u201d But, if you change your attitude and take care of your husband wholeheartedly, your children will receive many blessings throughout their lives as you will see for yourself in time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a woman who complained about having to take care of her husband who had suffered a cerebral hemorrhage which diminished his intelligence to that of a first grader. She wanted to stop caring for him because she had also been diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and needed care herself. Yes, it would be difficult to take care of her husband when she herself is sick. But there is one thing that she didn\u2019t know. She didn\u2019t realize that her life was actually being prolonged because she was doing something worthwhile. Taking care of her husband was not making her condition worse. Instead, it was helping her overcome the fear of her own death and alleviate her pain and loneliness since her focus was on her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You may think that you will live longer by staying home and doing nothing, but people are much healthier and tend to live longer when they have a job and stay active. If the woman had stayed home by herself and did nothing because of her 4th stage cancer, she would have become more depressed and would have been more fearful of death. Then her health would have deteriorated very rapidly. When you take care of people who are sicker than you are, your life becomes more meaningful. When you are working for other people\u2019s benefit, your body tends to function better and become healthier. In short, although the woman didn\u2019t realize it, her life was actually being prolonged thanks to her caring for her husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You should think to yourself, \u201cI am thankful that I am alive today. I am thankful that I am able to take care of someone else. I vow to be the person who will help others until I draw my last breath.\u201d If you have such positive attitude, you will invite good fortune. So far, your marriage has not been ideal, but what you do now will determine the fate of your relationship with your husband. If you are good to your husband, you will have a good relationship. If you do the opposite, you will have a bad relationship. I understand that things must be hard for you, but if you treat your husband with compassion and embrace him warmly, you may even experience true happiness as you yourself change into a more loving person. Being compassionate and keeping a positive attitude ensures that there will be a long-lasting happiness at the end of the short tunnel.<\/p>\n","post_title":"Caring For The Sick Brings Blessings","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"caring-for-the-sick-brings-blessings","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2023-12-27 21:02:55","post_modified_gmt":"2023-12-28 02:02:55","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/?p=17844","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

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Don’t Beg For Happiness

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