Q: A few years ago, my brother was diagnosed with mental illness. It\u2019s just really hard on my family. He is getting better now. But as his sister, I\u2019m not sure what I can do to help him. So I wanted to get your opinion. I try to encourage him, but I\u2019m not sure that\u2019s really helping.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> There is nothing you can do to help him. You have to accept that as a fact. You are suffering because you think you can help your brother when you actually can\u2019t. Furthermore, if you are too obsessed over that, there is a possibility that you might suffer mentally. It is because you might get too sad and might get depressed. Would it be good for both of you to have that kind of problem? It\u2019s better for just one of you to suffer, right? So it is good for you not to suffer. For your parents and even for your brother, it is good for you to be healthy. You have to know for sure that there is nothing much you can do for your brother. There is nothing you can do to comfort him or help him. But there are some small things you may do. You can eat with him. You can listen to him. But you shouldn\u2019t try to cure him or change him. You shouldn\u2019t even wish that he gets better. Respect the state he is in, and be thankful that he is alive. Only then can you maintain your own health. If your brother is in the depth of despair, if you go down there with him, you will also sink in that pit of despair. So, is it better that both of you drown or that at least you remain alive? Do you think it\u2019s not honourable for you as a sister to let him go? Does it mean that it is better for you to die with him? No, you have to let him go. It is because you have to live first. Then, even if he dies, you can pay him proper respect and honour his memory. So I want you to stop worrying about your brother. You have to be happy first and foremost. If you cry when you are with your brother, it\u2019s bad for your brother. You owe it to your brother to give him one more smile. So you need to truly realize that there is very little that you can do for your brother other than those little things. Do them faithfully. But of course, your brother is not just your family\u2019s responsibility. He is also the society\u2019s responsibility. You have to allow society with its welfare system to also take care of your brother since is not just your family\u2019s responsibility. It\u2019s a huge burden for a single family to take on. Even a parent must be able to let go although it\u2019s very difficult. You, as a sister, have to realize for sure that there is nothing you can do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"How Should I Help My Sick Brother?","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"how-should-i-help-my-sick-brother","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2022-09-10 07:23:01","post_modified_gmt":"2022-09-10 12:23:01","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=3564","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":3561,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-27 12:32:52","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-27 12:32:52","post_content":"\n

Q: I had a question about hot to develop better communication skill with my parents. When we talk about controversial issues or when they are angry, it's very hard to communicate with my parents. They usually put up the barrier, and make it quite difficult to communicate in a very civilized manner...So I was wondering how to properly, efficiently communicate with my parents without elevating our won blood pressure? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"How Can I Properly Communicate with My Parents?","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"how-can-i-properly-communicate-with-my-parents","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 01:14:01","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 01:14:01","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=3561","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":3501,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-27 00:57:50","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-27 00:57:50","post_content":"\n

Please click 'setting' and change the language mode to English.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q: My earnest wish is to communicate with my daughter. I don't believe that I have been that harsh toward her. I have been searching for what I might have done wrong. How can I communicate with my daughter?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"My Daughter and I Have Stopped Communicating","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"my-daughter-and-i-have-stopped-communicating","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 01:18:10","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 01:18:10","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=3501","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":3447,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-26 18:26:35","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-26 18:26:35","post_content":"\n

Please click 'setting' and change the language mode to English.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q: My son recently went off to college. He suddenly declared that he would become a woman. I'm so shocked and confused, I don't know what to do. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"My Son Wants to Become a Woman (English Subtitle)","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"my-son-wants-to-become-a-woman","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 01:47:00","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 01:47:00","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=3447","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":3031,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-23 00:32:42","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-23 00:32:42","post_content":"\n

Q: Thank you. It is an honor to be here. I have two questions: one about my past and one about my future. When I was twelve years old, I was abandoned. My mom left me to move to Guam from Boston to work and make money to sponsor one of my sisters from Vietnam, so she could come to America. When I was twelve, I didn\u2019t know any of that. I just felt that she had left me, and I never really recovered from that. So, at the age of twelve, I lived with my cousins, and then I was passed on to my sisters, and I stayed with her I was eighteen years old. And I have been supporting myself since I turned eighteen. I live with my mom right now. We talk, but I can\u2019t fully forgive her for what she did to me when I was twelve. And I\u2019ve always asked her about it. I tried to confront her, but she is 75 years old, and her story is different, and I\u2019m not satisfied with her answer. I don\u2019t feel like she\u2019s telling me the truth. And I try to get passed it, but I\u2019m always blaming her. And I don\u2019t know how to get passed that.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> How about the future?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> I know you said that there is no purpose in life, but I always feel there is a purpose and I can\u2019t figure it out. I am frustrated everyday trying to figure out my passion and what my goals are. Right now, I am an actress but I am struggling with a day time job and trying to pursue acting at the same time. I do not know where to go from here. I feel like I have so much potential, but I haven\u2019t tapped into it. I get frustrated because I feel like when I have goals I accomplish them and I get through them \u2013 I went through college and go to work \u2013 but I feel like I have no sense of purpose. I do not know where to go from here, and feel like I am just idling and procrastinating. That is my future question.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> Okay, thank you. So, there is no problem here and now, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> Sorry, what?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> There\u2019s no problem right here and now. At this very moment, there\u2019s no problem. But you started crying when you thought back about the past.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> Right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> And then you started to suffer emotionally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> Right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> No one is abandoning you right now, so it is the memory of being abandoned a long time ago that is making you suffer and feel sad right now. The cause of all your suffering, the reason you are suffering now, is all in the past. It\u2019s not something that\u2019s happening to you right now. You are living in the present, but your mind is filled with past memories. You are like an audience watching a movie in a movie theater. You feel sad when somebody dies in a movie, right? But if you turn off the screen, there is nothing there. Likewise, you have a personal screen in your head that is playing a video of your past over and over again. As you watch it, you feel sad, but you stop crying once you come back to the present. That\u2019s why you have to be awake in the present. If you start watching videos of your past again, your suffering will come back. Are you going to live the rest of your life watching videos of your past? That\u2019s why you have to be awake here and now. Look around you right now. Nothing is happening to you. You are alive. You are healthy. There is no reason for you to not be happy. But whenever you turn on the video inside your head, you suffer. Do you want to suffer? Then, continue watching that video. But if you do not want to suffer, stop watching it. Just throw away the video tape. But the problem is, it is difficult to throw away that tape because it just turns on automatically. That is why you need to make a little more effort. You need to practice and catch yourself whenever you see yourself slipping into the past and bring yourself right back to the present.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whenever you find yourself slipping into the past, come back to the present and focus on the tip of your nose and be conscious of your breathing in order to become awake to the fact that you are breathing in and out. Your breath comes in and goes out. The only reality to you right now is that you are breathing in and out. If you are awake in the present, there is no suffering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whatever skin color you are born with, whatever gender you are, whether you are disabled or healthy, whatever ethnicity you are, whatever religious faith you are born into, there is no reason for you to suffer because every person has the right to be happy. So whatever suffering you experienced as a young boy or young girl, whether your mother abandoned you, whether you were sexually exploited, all these things happened to you in the past. So, if you stop watching that video from the past, and remain awake in the present, you have the ability to make yourself happy. So ultimately, it boils down to your choice. Are you going to continue to be sad watching videos of your past, or are you going to live in the present and be happy? You have to decide. It is not your mom\u2019s fault. Your mother gave birth to you. Without your mom, you would not exist here. If you ever become a mother, you will understand how painful it is for a mother to abandon her child. I am sure there was a situation that forced her to make that choice. I think it is very difficult for us to imagine what kind of suffering she had to go through to abandon her child. Because you are at an age in which you can become a mom, I think you should try to understand your mom\u2019s point of view as well. So, this is the prayer you should focus on. \u201cMom, thank you for giving birth to me\u201d. The prayer should be one of gratitude. Any other thoughts you allow to slip into your mind will only make you miserable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The future takes care of itself. If you think about the future that has not come yet, you will become anxious and nervous about the future. Then, you will just be worried about the future. So, don\u2019t think too much about the future that still hasn\u2019t come because you have to be always awake in the present. Your experiences are not all bad for you. You said you are an actress, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> Yes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> Imagine you had to go back and draw and emote sadness, you have plenty of personal resources to draw from. You can probably be more authentic than any other person. Everything that you suffered in the past through your experiences can become the resource to build your future on. So, are you going to keep your experience as a source of suffering or as a resource that you can leverage to build your future? That is a choice you can make right now. Are you going to keep it as source of suffering? Are you going to keep it as your resource?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> Right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P:<\/strong> Please go ahead, if you have any further questions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Q:<\/strong> No, it\u2019s very clear now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"How Can I Forgive My Mother?","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"how-can-i-forgive-my-mother","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2022-09-10 07:46:54","post_modified_gmt":"2022-09-10 12:46:54","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=3031","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":2677,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-18 00:40:22","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-18 00:40:22","post_content":"\n

Q: My father lives in California. He's older, he's disabled. He's not very healthy and he's really strong in his faith in Christianity...When I go home, he asks me questions about am I saved, and what do I really believe and I find it really uncomfortable because I know what he wants me to say and I know that he's worried that I'll go to hell and I'm not born again...And so right now up to this point, I try to deflect, I try to be respectful, and I've tried to ignore. So I want to show up the best way I can for him, to honor him and also to ensure that I hold myself in a way that I respect him fully. And not feel just some sort of frustration. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\nhttps:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=01rF6Qm8gD0\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"How Do I Respect My Father's View?","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"how-do-i-respect-my-fathers-view","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 04:07:26","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 04:07:26","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=2677","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":2679,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-16 22:20:11","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-16 22:20:11","post_content":"\n

Q: You said that it is not necessary to have a dream. If you have one, that's fine. but it is better not to have one. I have always told my son to have a dream, to figure out what he wants, and to follow his dream. These days there are many lectures on this subject. I would like to hear your thoughts on them and about what you said earlier. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\nhttps:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qYQl0mvQk7k\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"Shall I Tell My Son That He Should Have a Dream?","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"shall-i-tell-my-son-that-he-should-have-a-dream","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 03:42:52","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 03:42:52","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=2679","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":2674,"post_author":"2","post_date":"2021-03-16 22:17:48","post_date_gmt":"2021-03-16 22:17:48","post_content":"\n

Q: I was born, educated and worked in Korea. I came here (Canada) to study temporarily and I fell in love with a guy who's Canadian and was born and educated here. But as I'm getting older, I want to go back to Korea. Is it really happy and healthy if I stay here just for my husband? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\nhttps:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=kYXE-_ZzUgo\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","post_title":"I Don\u2019t Want to Live In Canada Just Because of My Husband","post_excerpt":"","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"i-dont-want-to-live-in-canada-just-because-of-my-husband","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2021-05-14 03:50:34","post_modified_gmt":"2021-05-14 03:50:34","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"https:\/\/www.jungtosociety.org\/demo2021\/?p=2674","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"next":false,"prev":false,"total_page":1},"paged":1,"column_class":"jeg_col_2o3","class":"jnews_block_37"};

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Family

How Should I Help My Sick Brother?

March 27, 2021

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How Can I Properly Communicate with My Parents?

March 27, 2021

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My Daughter and I Have Stopped Communicating

March 27, 2021

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My Son Wants to Become a Woman (English Subtitle)

March 26, 2021

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How Can I Forgive My Mother?

March 23, 2021

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How Do I Respect My Father’s View?

March 18, 2021

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Shall I Tell My Son That He Should Have a Dream?

March 16, 2021

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