Nov 28, 2024- Dharma Talk at the 49-Day Memorial Service, Departure to India
Good morning. A new day has dawned at the Seoul Jungto Center. Overnight snowfall has blanketed various parts of downtown Seoul.
After completing his early morning practice and meditation, Sunim attended the 49-day memorial service for Dharma teacher Bosu’s mother at 10 AM. About 50 people, including family members, relatives, and fellow practitioners of Dharma Teacher Bosu, gathered in the Jijang Hall on the 4th floor of the Jungto Social and Cultural Center.
Before beginning the memorial service, there was a dedication ceremony, invocation of the spirit, and a time for offering incense. Then, the chief mourner offered tea to the deceased, and everyone bowed three times to request a Dharma talk from Sunim.
Sunim gave a Dharma talk for the deceased. The chief mourners took their seats in front of the Dharma platform, holding the portrait and memorial tablet of the deceased. Sunim explained the purpose behind the ritual of guiding the spirit of the deceased.
“From a broader perspective, birth and death are simply natural phenomena. Countless lives are being born and disappearing at this very moment in this world. The process of elements in nature coming together to form a body is mostly invisible to us because it occurs in the mother’s womb. We can usually only see life growing after birth. However, when a life completes its karmic connections and comes to an end, we witness the process of decomposition with our own eyes, which is why we experience such a profound shock at the death of a living being.
How Can We Alleviate the Sorrow of Death?
What if we could capture on video the entire process – from an invisible tiny zygote gradually growing into human form, then into a child, an adult, aging, falling ill, dying, and the body slowly decomposing and returning to the unseen? If we could watch this video at high speed, seeing the entire life cycle in just one minute, how would we view life? Countless people and countless lives are born, age, fall ill, and die. If we could see our lives as clouds gathering and dispersing, as water freezing and thawing, as clay figurines being made and broken, we wouldn’t be so attached to death. If we could see things from a broader perspective, there would be nothing to grieve or suffer over. However, living in reality, we lack such a broad perspective. That’s why we become attached even when parting with brief encounters, feeling regret, and sometimes shedding tears when that regret becomes overwhelming. So when faced with the death of a loved one whom we can never see again, the sense of loss is inevitably immense. That’s why we often find ourselves unable to control our sorrow in the face of death.
How can we escape the pain of death in such a life? Enlightened beings like the Buddha have profoundly and comprehensively understood the true essence of existence. They view the birth and death of life as a natural phenomenon, like waves rising and falling, so they have no fear or sorrow about death. However, no matter how much we hear about this reality, it remains just a thought, and our hearts are still immersed in sadness. That’s why people have long talked about the afterlife, saying “there’s a good world to go to after death.” They took comfort in the idea that although the current parting is regrettable, it’s not something to be too sad about because the deceased person is going to a better world. However, many people today question this belief, asking, “Is that really true?” or “Isn’t that just a made-up story?”
When we fall ill, we take medicine. While some people know why they get better after taking the medicine because they understand its components, most of us just know it’s medicine if we recover after taking it. Very few people take medicine knowing what components make up the drug and why it cures the disease. Similarly, nowadays, everyone drives a car without knowing its structure or how to fix it when it breaks down. No one asks drivers if they understand the principles of how a car moves or if they can repair it when it breaks down. In the same way, even if we don’t fully understand the afterlife, the belief that we’ll go to a better world after death gives great strength to those who fear death. Through this comfort, we can calm our great sorrow. That’s why rituals to console human grief in the face of death have long been practiced not only in specific religions but in all religions and human communities everywhere.
In ancient times, humans lived as hunter-gatherers. We know that with the advent of agricultural societies, people settled in one place, forming villages, which led to the emergence of social classes and religions. However, recent archaeological discoveries at several sites have revealed evidence that contradicts our previous understanding. These sites show no traces of farming or communal living spaces, yet they contain massive structures resembling temples for religious ceremonies. This discovery suggests that religious rituals may have preceded other developments. The need to construct these buildings for religious purposes likely required many people, leading to communal living, which in turn led to farming and animal husbandry. This completely reverses the order of events as we previously understood them. If true, this could mean that religion preceded and potentially gave rise to human civilization, rather than civilization developing first and then giving birth to religion.
The development of human cognition brought both advantages and disadvantages. On the positive side, it allowed us to accumulate and pass on experiences. However, it also led to attachment, sorrow, and suffering due to our memories. This issue cannot be resolved through analysis alone. Many people, unaware of the true causes of their sorrow and suffering, have been misled by various tales of the afterlife, leading to numerous negative consequences. This has resulted in a widespread negative view of religious beliefs such as the afterlife and reincarnation. However, from a historical perspective, these religious practices can be seen as one of the roots of human civilization, regardless of their perceived merits or drawbacks. Humans have used beliefs about the afterlife to alleviate their fear of death and comfort themselves in the face of loss, believing that they and their loved ones will go to a certain place after death.
Thus, if people believed that the afterlife existed in heaven, funeral rituals were developed to pray for the deceased to go to heaven. If they believed the afterlife was deep underground, funeral rites were created accordingly. In places where people believed in reincarnation, cremation practices were established to help the deceased let go of attachment to the physical body and be reborn quickly. In cultures that believed the afterlife was at the bottom of the sea, sea burial customs emerged. In this way, various funeral cultures developed based on how people envisioned the afterlife.
Why Is There No Mention of the Afterlife in the Buddha’s Teachings?
So how does Buddhism depict the afterlife? In the Buddha’s fundamental teachings, there is no mention of an afterlife. Why is there no talk of the afterlife in the Buddha’s teachings? Having attained enlightenment, he saw this world broadly and expansively. He viewed life and death as the gathering and dispersing of clouds, so he had no fear in the face of death. Therefore, there was no need to talk about the afterlife. When questioned about the afterlife, the Buddha remained silent. He believed that to attain liberation and nirvana, it was important to open one’s eyes wide and become enlightened, rather than debating whether “this is true or not” or “this is right or that is right.” However, not everyone who follows the Buddha’s teachings becomes enlightened. Consequently, for those who did not attained enlightenment in the community of practitioners, the issue of death remained unresolved. Therefore, even within the Sangha, they accepted practices that were in line with local customs, excluding those rituals that had negative effects or made people foolish, from among the many existing afterlife rituals. However, even regarding his own funeral, the Buddha said, “Just let the people of the world handle it as they see fit. Leave it to their customs.”
Therefore, we have no choice but to practice two things today. First, we must open our eyes to foolishness as per the Buddha’s original teachings and reach a state where there is no fear or sorrow about death itself. It’s about reaching a state where thoughts about the afterlife are unnecessary. Second, however, we must also perform religious rituals to comfort people’s sorrow of separation in reality.
When you talk about enlightenment, you try to deny religious rituals, and when you talk about religious rituals, you raise the question, “Then what is enlightenment?” Practitioners don’t place much importance on food, clothing, or shelter, regardless of what they eat, wear, or where they sleep. They also don’t care much about whether others respect them or not. That’s why they would go to others’ houses to collect alms, wear tattered clothes discarded by others, and sleep under trees. Living like that, they didn’t care how others treated them.
However, until we reach that level of enlightenment, what is our reality? When eating, isn’t tasty food better than bland food? Isn’t sleeping in a house better than under a tree? Isn’t it preferable when people treat us warmly rather than coldly? This is our current reality. Therefore, the Chendojae (memorial service) consists of a brief Dharma talk aimed at reaching a state of fearlessness and liberation, as well as religious rituals praying for the deceased to go to a better place to console the grief of the living. While our ultimate goal is liberation through enlightenment, the Chendojae ritual primarily focuses on wishing for the deceased to go to a good place and eventually attain enlightenment by hearing the Buddha’s teachings, reflecting our current unenlightened state.
Three Components of Chendojae
Chendojae consists of three elements, all of which seem to derive from human practices in this world. When we deserve punishment for hitting others or stealing, there are ways to mitigate the punishment. First, we must make amends. Since ancient times, people have made amends with material offerings when they’ve done something wrong. So, the first element is giving. However, it’s impossible to give to each individual we’ve harmed, as we’ve unknowingly caused harm or received benefits from countless people throughout our lives. If we trace the chain of connections of who we’ve taken from or benefited from, and how those people have acted in turn, we ultimately find that the poorest people in the world are those who have suffered the most harm. Therefore, giving to the poorest people becomes a way of repaying our debts. In the past, the poorest were those who were hungry. There’s no greater poverty than not being able to eat. So, during Chendojae, a lot of food was prepared and primarily given to the poor. When we give, our sins are absolved.
However, when it comes time for compensation, simply saying, “How much do you need? Would 3 million won be enough?” and acting as if monetary compensation solves everything can make the other party feel upset, preventing resolution. Therefore, secondly, one must apologize for their wrongdoing. Even today, the historical issues between Korea and Japan remain unresolved because Japan takes the approach of saying, “We’ve already given you compensation money.” To sincerely apologize by saying, “I’m sorry. I’ve committed an unforgivable sin,” one must first realize their mistake. This is why a Dharma talk is necessary – to help one realize their wrongdoings. Thus, a memorial service must always include a Dharma talk. Even if a monk doesn’t give the talk, the content of the sutras you recite during the service contains teachings that help you understand the nature of life. Through this process, one should repent.
Thirdly, what should you do if the issue still isn’t resolved? Bodhisattvas who have vowed to save those who are suffering are Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva and Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva. You earnestly appeal to these Bodhisattvas. You pray to these vow-making Bodhisattvas, saying, “Since you’ve pledged to help those who are suffering, please help me avoid that suffering.” As Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva primarily oversees the afterlife, we call upon him. Buddhist memorial services for the deceased are mainly based on the Three Pure Land Sutras. The practice of holding a 49-day memorial service and praying for rebirth in the Pure Land is a Pure Land school ritual based on the Three Pure Land Sutras, which is now used by all Buddhist sects.
“If you have suddenly awakened and realized that ‘I am free from birth and death,’ you can leave without participating in today’s memorial service. (Laughter) However, if you still have foolishness and attachments in your heart, we can lighten our mental burden through this memorial service ritual.”
Sunim then gave a Dharma talk for the deceased.
“During your lifetime, you saw with your eyes, heard with your ears, smelled with your nose, tasted with your tongue, felt with your body, and thought with your mind, clinging to notions like ‘This is me,’ ‘This is mine,’ and ‘This is right.’ But now, in this state where you cannot see, hear, smell, taste, touch, or think, what can you call ‘I’? What can you claim as ‘mine’? What can you assert as ‘right’?
Oh, departed soul! What is your original appearance?
If you can answer my question promptly now, then even if you have committed various evil deeds and broken precepts in your past lives up until now – such as killing, stealing, sexual misconduct, lying, or drinking alcohol to intoxication – these will be like a midsummer night’s dream and will not result in any karmic consequences. You will immediately be liberated from the six realms of rebirth and achieve nirvana. However, if you hesitate, feel confused and anxious, and cannot answer at all, then even if you performed many acts of releasing animals, practiced generosity, lived purely, spoke truthfully, and acted wisely during your lifetime, these too will be like a midsummer night’s dream. They will be of no help in achieving nirvana now. Therefore, let go of all attachments, focus your consciousness, and try once more to answer my question.
Dear departed soul! What is your original appearance?
Now, let go of all feelings, whether love or hate. Burn them all away as if in a fire, and may you fly freely to the Pure Land where Amitabha Buddha resides with a light heart.
After the Dharma talk, a solemn chanting was performed to pray for the departed soul’s passage. The chief mourners first offered tea at the altar, followed by the guests who came forward to offer tea in turn. Finally, everyone sang “Return to the Light” together, a song wishing for rebirth in the Pure Land, concluding the memorial service.
After the memorial service, Sunim departed from the Jungto Center at 2 PM and headed to Incheon Airport.
After an hour’s drive, Sunim arrived at the airport, checked in the luggage, and completed the departure procedures. Although it had snowed heavily for two days, fortunately, the weather cleared up in the afternoon. The flight was expected to be significantly delayed, but it was only postponed by 40 minutes and safely departed from Incheon Airport at 6:10 PM.
After a 6-hour flight, Sunim arrived at Bangkok Airport, the layover destination, at 9:40 PM local time. With only 30 minutes to transfer to the next flight, there was a risk of missing connecting flight.
Upon disembarking, Sunim moved quickly and barely made it to the gate for the Chennai-bound flight. Fortunately, the scheduled boarding time was slightly delayed. Sunim reviewed manuscript corrections at the gate before boarding the plane.
The flight departing Bangkok Airport at 10:45 PM is scheduled to arrive at Chennai Airport in India at 12:30 AM local time after another 3 hours and 30 minutes of travel. Starting tomorrow, Sunim will attend the INEB (International Network of Engaged Buddhists) conference in Chennai, Tamil Nadu, India, for three days. He will deliver a keynote speech and engage in discussions with Buddhists from various countries.
